STARS: KEVEN JAMES, JAYMA MAYS, KEIR O’DONNELL, RAINI RODRIGUEZ, AND ADHIR KALYAN
DIRECTED BY: STEVE CARR
RUN TIME: 91 MIN.
A funny slapstick comedy that’s really written for the kids. The basic plot is a complete parody of the first Die Hard film. There is some funny dialog but most of the laughs come mainly from Keven James falling over himself and acting like an improv version of Chris Farley.
The film opens with Paul Blart (James) training in the New Jersey Police Academy. Unfortunately he doesn’t make it past the physical because he’s overweight and hypoglycemic. Cut to 10 years later, as he finds himself raising his daughter alone with the help of his mother. His security guard job is really all he’s got to look forward to, as he chronically eats his way out of depression. His daughter Maya (Rodriguez) is trying to set him up with an online dating service but he’s not getting any matches. During the busy Christmas season as he’s cruising around on his Security Segway he meets Amy (Mays), a kiosk hair extension salesperson. He quickly falls for her (literally), and trys to win her affection by purchasing some hair extensions for himself. He’s not the smoothest guy, as fellow mall employees make fun of him and the way he takes his job too seriously.
Things get ugly as Santa’s helpers are really terrorists, and stage a hostile takeover of the mall during Black Friday. Of course in true Die Hard fashion the crooks aren’t after merchandise they’re after the credit card ID codes. Accidentally preoccupied playing Guitar Hero in the video arcade, Paul emerges to find the mall deserted. As he attempts to escape, he sees that his potential girlfriend Amy is still inside. She’s being held hostage by the head thug Vick Sims (O’Donnell). Adding to the mild tension of the story, upon delivering a healthy batch of sloppy joe’s, Maya is also captured by the terrorists. At this point, the film takes off into a mildly funny parody of Die Hard as Paul must save Amy and his daughter from the bumbling terrorists.
I really can’t recommend this film if your over 17 years old. The Die Hard angle is humorous to a point but it gets old. Keven James is very talented, but its sad to see his character roles continue to take advantage of his overweight stature. The film mainly makes fun of his obesity and his prat falls.
There are a couple of funny scenes, one where Paul attempts to pull over an old man for speeding in his miracle chair, and a very funny scene where he gets drunk in a karaoke bar and later gets a tattoo of the Lock Ness Monster on his ass. While watching this film I realized that the kids in the audience were laughing more than I was. Possibly a good drinking game rental if your a Die Hard fan, but overall Mall Cop is a rental for the kids.